Thursday, June 30, 2011

Money Tree??

Where? Okay I know, and have to say this will probably be last blog for a bit as we are in the process of moving. Wouldn't we all love to have one, not sure about that though if you think about it every single one of us has one there would be no need for anything, who would you buy from everyone is independently wealth as they can just pick it off of the tree to spend but who would work if you had that option? Wouldn't we all just choose to stay with our loved ones? Spend all our time with them?

Nope just wouldn't work, we have to have places to spend all that mass fortune. I think that we all want, some of us just want enough to get by on, others want it all, things they need and those they don't need.

I am pretty happy having my needs met each month that flows into each year. Sure like some of you I want to take that trip to see those lands that beckon to me, would love to spend each day strolling along a beach hand in hand with Cathy or watching the sunset in far off Scotland or Ireland. To welcome each day in a new location wow would be awesome. But then hey I think what we have is pretty awesome as well, the short little trips we get to take, fixing dinner side by side, enjoying each other in whatever it is we choose to do with our free time, the responsibilities of the day shaken loose and let go off for another day. At our age is difficult to find places that neither one of us has seen, but to find those and experience them together yep this is much better than a money tree.

I have always believed that God will take care of us, and you know what He does, we tell him what our needs are and every single time He meets them. To me it doesn't get any better than this, except maybe for more of the same.

Sorry no picture on this, having a heck of a time with the pictures can't even get it to upload one of me, so you will have to look at FB profile if you want to see the mysterious lady behind these blogs until I can figure it out.

Thanks for stopping by, hope you enjoy my thoughts on a Money Tree.

Have a great weekend and 4th of July


Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Control?? Hmm I think not.

What a topic, almost just let this one pass on by. Not much into control freaks, those that know what is best for you or so they think. Those that want to tell you that nope you can't do that or you should do this. Yep pretty much just going to let them go by the side, oh please do enjoy those they are able to control but when a person allows those words "You can't do this" slip out of the mouth towards me anyway danged if I am not going to do my best to do what I have been told I can't do.

Now don't get me wrong, if advice is asked for and then given that is way different. I love my Mother with all my heart she can be fun, we have some good times together but bless her heart she loves to tell others what they should and shouldn't do, me being top of that list because I am the one she sees the most. It is so hard to raise our parents lol they have to be taught that we are indeed adults like it or not, and can make our own decisions, right or wrong they are ours to make. I told her one time Mother for gosh sake I am 50 years old how do I have to be before you realize you can't tell me what to do anymore? Yep pretty much went over like a lead balloon.

Please understand that a lot of this is done in fun, she gives me hell I call her an old hag and tell her to knock it off, we both laugh and go on our way. She knows in her own heart that I am going to do what I feel I need to do for myself regardless of how she feels about it. She really is quite a grand old lady who will forever be 39, cause you know if Jack Benny can do it so can she.

Now taking all this into serious thought and consideration I have found that oh my gosh I have become my Mother, telling my kids they can't do this or that, oh gosh what the heck was I thinking? Fact is I wasn't, but when I did you could picture me stepping back and telling myself now Jul you have to let them do as they please it is their life after all, theirs to make or break and experience what they choose to. We don't often see eye to eye on what they do, and at times I cringe at what I know (ya know because we as Mom's are so smart and know it all) what the outcome of what they are about to take on is going to be.

In doing this I finally understand what my poor Mother has gone through all these years, but it still doesn't make what she or I did right. Just means we need to understand that we have to allow our control to slip and let everyone do as they want. I have noticed my Mother let herself relax a little these last few years and her making the statement many times that everyone has to live their own lives the way they choose and we have to allow them to do that.

So pretty much content to just sit back watch and see what happens, I would never dream of taking away any one's freedom, so not going to take away anything they might experience by making their own choices. Gotta say that at times it can be hard not to make a comment, but letting go of that control is good not just for me as I am no longer responsible for what they do, nor do I have to help them clean up the mess if there is one and can only smile and tell them good job when they do right.

Thanks for reading

Blessings n' hugs


Monday, June 6, 2011

Once I was Lost but now I am Found

Gosh can't help it, when those words are used together I can't help but think of the song "Amazing Grace", and I have no doubts that I am not alone. I think at some point in each one of our lives we have all felt this way and can relate to that song.

Those that know me should not have any doubts about my love and devotion to God so this blog does not need to cover that.

I have lost so many things in my life but heck when you are knocking on 57 how can you not lose something along the roads we travel? We each make decisions in our lives that take us down a road that many in our lives just refuse to travel along with us so those loses are the hardest to bear at times.

Losing my health probably hit the hardest gosh I was just a young 30 years and my kids were still in there early teen age years. I grieve over the years lost there with them, oh I spent the time with them but I was not spending the time doing what I wanted to. I was one of those Mom's who got dirty with them, who played ball with my boys. Who got out there and helped them build that tree house, except we didn't have a tree in that yard so it was a fort build from the ground up. I had a very open relationship with my boys, wasn't a question they couldn't ask me that I wouldn't answer for them somehow of course at times they didn't get all the answer their little minds couldn't process the whole answer but enough to satisfy them until they could understand. We were 3 spirits roaming the country seeing all that we could take in with our eyes. People use to tell me that I needed to settle down and sink in some roots show the kids some stability, I am so thankful that I did not listen to them and allowed my wandering spirit to do as we did. We have some amazing memories that would be nothing more than dust in the wind if I had of. And life goes on, the seasons cycle around and my boys are now older than I was when I got sick.

Yes as I have traveled this road in my life I have lost a lot, as I said we all have. But I have found peace, I have learned to cherish those moments in my younger years that I was able to do those things and to hang tight to those memories, and learned to make more not only that I will have but those I love will have to see them through when they feel lost. I have seen people walk out of my life and felt my heart being torn out and discarded as though it was nothing more than trash to be thrown away. I have a saying to my kids and this includes not only those that I gave birth to but those who have chosen me as a Mom, when life throws you on the ground you have nothing left to do but stand up, dust off and go on, God does not give us more than we can handle or bear, at times it is hard but we do get through it. This to shall pass, if you can only hang onto that thought you will come through anything. My peace is in wishing each and everyone the best life has to offer, and knowing I have a wonderful lady by side every step of the way.

In the end God will take me home and there is no greater peace than that. No better way to be found.

Have a great week all, thanks for reading.

Blessings n' hugs

Jul ♥